For two years, I have committed myself to change. Two years of sobriety, two years of meeting every requirement asked of me, two years of striving daily to be better than I was the day before. This path has brought me so much: a renewed faith, the joy of watching my husband's re-dedication and baptism, and the precious countdown to the end of a difficult probation period this coming May.

Yet, despite this tangible progress, many of us face a heartbreaking reality: our internal transformation is never deemed "enough" by those who choose to remain in judgment.

*The False Narrative: "You Did It to Yourself"

When you hear phrases like "it's life" or "you did it to yourself," it’s not an attempt to understand; it’s an attempt to dismiss your pain and the work you’ve done.

It is excruciating when a simple name—like being called "Mom"—is weaponized, replaced with a cold, distancing title like "birth mom" or by your first name. That is a deliberate, deep cut to your momma heart. It is natural to ask: "If they choose to call someone else 'Mom,' why can't I be 'Mom,' too?" Your love doesn't take away from theirs. It seeks inclusion, not exclusivity.

*The Grace You Deserve*

We must stop living for the moment they might finally say, "You've changed." You deserve grace, too. And here is where you find it:

*Your Proof is in Your Peace: Your dedication to growth—from sobriety to fulfilling your court obligations—is your witness. Your progress is not a performance for their approval; it is the foundation of the safe, stable life you are building for yourself and your loved ones who do choose to stay.

*Understand that some people desperately want to see you fail. They want to watch you break so they can validate their judgment and say, "See? I told you he/she'd never change." Don't give them that power. You know your heart, you know your effort, and you know you have already changed.

* Giving Up Is Not an Option:
When you feel depleted and wonder how you keep going, remember that giving up means proving their judgment right. Your perseverance is your power. You don't continue to prove them wrong; you continue to prove your faith and your self-worth right. Your journey is about honoring the commitment you made to yourself and to God, not to your critics.

*Your life is your own- If others choose to be a part of it, you welcome them with open arms.
If they don't, it is genuinely their loss—the loss of witnessing and sharing in your redemption.

*Hold onto the truth you know:
*You have tried, You have improved, and You are enough!
* Your grace is earned, not through their acceptance, but through your persistent faith!